You’re running at a hundred miles
Flashing that million-dollar smile
And everybody turns to stone when they see that you’re alone…
-opening lyrics to “Sweet Lady” by What Made Milwaukee Famous
I think I first wanted braces when Jennifer Stogdill got them in the third grade. Jennifer was the epitome of coolness at Brown Elementary School. Her clothes always [...]
Have you ever met a vegan who was not annoying? Yeah, me neither. When I was a cocktail waitress in California, the following happened to me after I delivered a vegan valley girl the piña colada she had ordered:
VEGAN VALLEY GIRL: Excuse me, ma’am? Is there milk in this?
ME: Well, there’s coconut milk…
VEGAN VALLEY GIRL: [...]
Dear WordPress,
I did it. I’m a free woman! I finally left Blogger. We had been together for eight years, and things just weren’t progressing the way I had hoped they would. I kept seeing you out with my friends (like The Smallman), and I’ll admit it. I was jealous. Nonetheless, I tried to stick it [...]